How To Keep Your Girlfriend
Written by Anthony Parkes on Dating, Featured - Follow him on Twitter.
Do you have problems with your girlfriend? Good, because we all do.
Many articles, books, magazines, and websites will teach how to get a girlfriend, but few will actually explain how to make her stay afterwards. I’m about to do that.
The first thing you guys have got to understand is the structure of a relationship. There are three parts to it:
- Seduction – You put up a show, try to charm, impress, and woo the girl
- Dating – You’ve got her! You spend loads of time together, have fun and chill.
- Breakup – One of you is bored, maybe bored enough to have found another partner.
Each phase logically leads to the next one, and many people already in the “breakup” phase start questionning their relationship and asking “what did I do wrong?”. Sadly, it’s too late, they’re already experiencing the breakup.
“What did I do wrong?” – This question, this vital question, you should be asking yourself in the second stage – dating.
The Problem Most Guys Face
How many guys hear the dreaded “I don’t love you anymore” each day? Probably too much.
The problem is that many guys look short-term only. And anyway, she’s your girlfriend right? You’ve succesfully attracted her.
Men are proud beings, and are easily blinded by success. As a result, they start taking their partner for granted. This means that they stop working on the relationship, stop giving the girl time, attention, and love.
And everbody in this damn world bloody well knows: Never, ever, take anything for granted.
She, as a result of your vastly overdevelopped alpha-male ego, loses the pearl every guy craves: interest.
The Solution: How To Keep Her
To keep her, you have to keep her interest in you at soaring high levels. And to do so, never stop charming her, being a challenge, and all you used to do when you were trying to get her. Otherwise, you’ll lose all your value.
This means there should only be two phases in a relationship: Seduction and Breakup. That doesn’t work – seduction can’t lead to breakup!
Which means the only recipe to finding and keeping a girl is seduction. Sorry guys, you don’t have much of a choice.
When you’re wooing and cooing her as you meet her, never think of dating or the first kiss as an objective. Think of it as a milestone, as a motivator to keep your charm and attractiveness at high levels.
The key to keeping a girl: Never stop flirting with her, never take her for granted. And above all, never stop captivating her, like you did so well when you met her.
That’s the recipe for happiness :) Good Luck!
Images by: alicepopkorn and adwriter.
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Excellent article, Anthony.
I think the part about taking her for granted is especially relevant. Most people, not just guys, tend to think once the deal is done, they don’t have to impress their partner anymore. That’s the wrong way to go about it.
Although you can never guarantee that your girl will stay, I think following the advice here would give you your best shot at it.
Scott,
I beleive that any girl can fall in love with you if you do the right thing (that’s personal opinion), and thus I also believe any girl can be kept if you try correctly to do so (I’m not claiming this is THE way to keep her, but I do think it’s A way).
I agree that male and female can take their significant other for granted, but I believe men are more prone to this than women, because of their ego.
And to stop a woman from taking you for granted, you have to keep being a challenge… which you were when you met right? Hence staying in the “seduction” phase.
Thank you Scott for the nice words and above all, for sharing your opinion ;)
Anthony
Just be yourself! Or else it’ll be very tiring trying to keep a girl. If you’re nerdy and shy, some girls are into that! I know some girls that don’t like charming guys. So whatever you are, be that, and you’ll attract the right girl for you.
In my own humble opinion if you constantly have to work to keep a girl from saying ‘I don’t love you any more’ – you have yet to find the right girl.
After quite a few years coming to pass and one to many failed relationships along the road I made the decision eventually to truly be myself, sometimes lazy, sometimes romantic, sometimes grumpy, sometime joyful to the brim “to thy self be true”.
So I am now just that and my wife loves me for who I am and not who I try to be in order to please her.
l absolutely appreciate the above articles, l am a very shy guy but l tend to hide behind it and l sometime come off as a mean person to many. now that l read these articles, l think it makes sense to step up from my Mr. shy guy mode and usher myself into a new me..trying is worth having. seek and you shall fine knock and the door shall be open up to you!!! thanks!!